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Many Kiwi parents still consider smacking as acceptable
#1
There was an article in the news here in NZ recently about a survey that showed that despite the law a third of mothers admitted to still smacking (spanking) their children and 1 in 10 parents said that they frequently spanked their children.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/94166691...-to-parent
CASEY
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#2
Hi Casey ,
Very interesting article.
Not good to read that your Country has such high rates of bad stuff;. though I guess very embarrassingly that Britain has a place near the top of such research tables too.

On to happier things , how is your winter vacation time ?

Big respect Bs
Stepdad of Three
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#3
Interesting.

There is definitely a social/cultural dimension to corporal punishment, beyond the short term effects. Those short term behavioral effects add up, and can help kids move on to college, as just one example. Also, it supports parental authority in a very concrete way, which makes a lot of children feel much more secure at home, at school, and with their peers.
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#4
Yes New Zealand has a pretty bad record for domestic violence / children being killed at the hands of a parent or other family member.

I don't think that the change of law did much to protect these children. Murder and serious assault is a crime and was a crime before. I understand the point that a parent who lost their temper and punched a child could led to more serious violence and under the previous law there was a legal defense that allowed parents to use reasonable force and in the situation I mentioned above parents were found not guilty. It did go to court though.

The parents that are violently abusing their kids often because that was how they were brought up (particularly Maori and Pacific people) are going to continue to do so. Leaders in these communities should take responsibility to work with families to break the cycle of family violence.

There is a difference between a spanking and domestic abuse. I realise that some people would define the spankings I get as abusive. But my aunt has never spanked me in anger. She may be annoyed or frustrated but is calm and in control when she whoops my butt. She is quite methodical when it comes to discipline. She has never left bruises but my butt is definitely sore when she has finished. Now that I'm older I'm spanked more severely and my butt is usually still sore the next day but after that its back to normal.

I also understand that not everyone would agree with the enforced nudity part of my punishments. She has toned this back as I got older but it is still a big part of the punishment.

I was surprised 1 in 10 parents spanked regularly. That number is higher than what I expected.
CASEY
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#5
(07-08-2017, 11:43 AM)Kyle Wrote: I have nothing to back this up, however I have always felt that spanking/smacking is much more popular than most studies show or that most people admit to, at least here in the US. I think it is just spoken about much less. Perhaps the percentage of parents that provide a full-blown bare bottom spanking may be on the decline, however I think those that provide some sort of spanking happens more than we are lead to believe. I know in our circle of friends, whether it be from the kids school, church, neighborhood or other settings, some element of spanking is not all that uncommon. I will add that the level of spanking very likely is nowhere near what it was in say the 50's and 60's, but I don't think it is all that rare either.

I agree, I also think it is much more common than these studies want you to think. It is just so taboo to talk about, at least that's what I feel like, especially in public.
MICHAEL
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#6
(07-08-2017, 04:24 PM)Casey Wrote: Yes New Zealand has a pretty bad record for domestic violence / children being killed at the hands of a parent or other family member.

I don't think that the change of law did much to protect these children. Murder and serious assault is a crime and was a crime before. I understand the point that a parent who lost their temper and punched a child could led to more serious violence and under the previous law there was a legal defense that allowed parents to use reasonable force and in the situation I mentioned above parents were found not guilty. It did go to court though.

The parents that are violently abusing their kids often because that was how they were brought up (particularly Maori and Pacific people) are going to continue to do so. Leaders in these communities should take responsibility to work with families to break the cycle of family violence.

There is a difference between a spanking and domestic abuse. I realise that some people would define the spankings I get as abusive. But my aunt has never spanked me in anger. She may be annoyed or frustrated but is calm and in control when she whoops my butt. She is quite methodical when it comes to discipline. She has never left bruises but my butt is definitely sore when she has finished. Now that I'm older I'm spanked more severely and my butt is usually still sore the next day but after that its back to normal.

I also understand that not everyone would agree with the enforced nudity part of my punishments. She has toned this back as I got older but it is still a big part of the punishment.

I was surprised 1 in 10 parents spanked regularly. That number is higher than what I expected.

Casey,

As you know, my presence here on the board has been quite spotty over the last couple years. I haven't really been around to "see" you grow and mature as some other members have.

So I have to tell you, I am incredibly impressed with your level of maturity and intelligence. You are definitely not the little boy you were when we first met you. Your aunt and your cousins should be very proud.

Cheers. Smile
MICHAEL
Dad of 3 boys - Michael (19), Andrew (15), Daniel (13) and mentor to 1 boy - Jonathan (13)
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#7
I just love the picture they used. A parent with a balled up fist. Talk about liberal media
RACHAEL
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#8
(08-10-2017, 10:41 PM)Rachael Wrote: I just love the picture they used. A parent with a balled up fist. Talk about liberal media

And the other one they like to use a fair bit is of a young boy cowering in the corner with father holding a belt folded in half at his waist. Shot upwards so the father looks like a towering figure.

Oh and thanks Michael.
CASEY
Junior Alumni
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#9
This Kiwi parent paddles.
Henry
Single Father of Two
New Zealand
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