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Babysitters
#1
So I have a question about when my husband and I are away from home and Ivy has a babysitter. Should we let the babysitter spank her? Her babysitter has known her since she was 3, so obviously she has known Ivy for a long time. I don't want Ivy's afternoon/evening to be ruined waiting for a spanking - that doesn't seem fair. On the flip side a spanking is very personal, especially because I spank Ivy on her bare bottom. Thoughts?
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#2
I would say no. I would just tell the babysitter if she misbehaves give her a time out. Depending on the seriousness of her misbehavior you could always spank her when you got home.
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#3
I wouldn't recommend letting your babysitter spank your children. One time a situation had come up while I was babysitting and I would have been allowed to spank the child because of the incident being severe enough where I had to call their mom, but I didn't want to. I don't regret the decision at all.
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#4
I think this is highly dependent on the situation. If the sitter is a relative or close family friend that you and your child trust, then I think its perfectly acceptable for the sitter to spank in a manner you both agree upon. This would be a benefit for the child to have their punishment done and over with, allowing for a more pleasant time afterward for everyone. This is especially beneficial if the parents won't be returning until after their child's bedtime.

On the flip side, if your sitter doesn't really have a strong emotional connection to your family, then I think it would usually be best for a parent to spank as soon as reasonably possible.

Bottom line - I don't think there should be a hard and fast rule here. It should be determined on a case by case basis... Whichever works for that particular family.
MICHAEL
Dad of 3 boys - Michael (19), Andrew (15), Daniel (13) and mentor to 1 boy - Jonathan (13)
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#5
Our views mirror Eric's. Almost all of our families are two parent households. Every rule has exceptions for us. If a parent(s) becomes incapacitated, deploy in the military or on a prolonged trip, the approval may be given to a surrogate. However, that person would be a close family member only and would be the sole person responsible. There's no Round Robin. We definitely wouldn't go for an outside babysitter. Though, most of the time someone from the family babysits for our children.

In our house, in particular, our grandchildren are living under the same roof, or are here being cared for just a hundred feet from their own door. All of ours are single parents, and we do our best to help out. My husband, their grandfather, spanks kids 2-5 yo that may be here day to day. He's very selective about when he uses spanking. He doesn't want to dilute his sons' authority. Things he's spanked Gabe for this summer were: sneaking in the pool alone. The gate was open for maintenance, but the motion alarms were still active. So Gabe was caught immediately; climbing up and taking matches and emergency candles; hiding from him in a public place, and directly defying him (including kicking a hole in the kitchen wall) on two occasions.

Our sons are often nearby, and he texts them first. If they can get home in a reasonable time, he waits for them. So they agree on this. Once they start school, their grandfather considers his job done in this respect. They use that as a cut off. There are two grandchildren (our daughter is a widow) that are in his custody. He disciplines them, as he sees fit. He is their primary disciplinarian. He will not keep children for an extended period, unless we have legal custody. If he does have such custody, he will spank up to age 17. It's only based on what's needed.
Mrs. V
Grandmother/Caregiver of 8 -6 at home, 2 boys: Nicolaas15 & Gabe 5; 4 girls: Lisbeth 15, Natalie 14, Lizzie 10 & Ashleigh 8 - 2 girls away from home 22 & 17 (2 adult sons and 1 adult daughter, all single parents)
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#6
I am in the camp that it really depends on the situation, mainly who is babysitting. If our kids were being babysat by my wife's parents or perhaps a couple of other close family members, I would have no issue with it. In fact, my wife's parents have spanked our two kids. There are one or two families what we know through church where I would likely be okay with it as well. Other than that, I would probably not be okay with it. I have very strong feelings that spanking is such an important event, that requires that it be administered by someone who no doubt as the child's best interest at heart and knows what they are doing with spanking.

If our kids were being babysat by someone who perhaps we did not feel completely comfortable should have the authority to spank the kids, and something took place while we are gone that a spanking was needed, then I would certainly take care of the task when we got home.
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#7
(09-12-2016, 02:33 AM)Jess Wrote: I will also say that Morgan is allowed to swat and only swat (no more than a few on a clothed bottom) the Kylie and the twins if needed when she is babysitting, but it has to be a situation where it is really needed to get them under control. She knows that if she were to ever abuse that privilege, then she would be getting a spanking herself and lose that right.

Jess,

As far as Morgan being allowed to swat a clothed bottom, I am just wondering if you ever see that changing as she gets older and even more mature. Do you feel that it is possible that when she is a few years older that you would permit her to spank the younger kids bare bottom or over underwear?

Thanks for sharing your thoughts,

Jason
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#8
I can agree. Hallie will never be allowed to spank Chelsea and definitely not Christa. I don't think it's a sibling responsibility or job to discipline their sibling in anyway. Now maybe if like Jess is talking about. You have an adult child and a very young child and that child stays with the adult child then I could see that but siblings living at home at the same time I don't think so.
KIMBERLY
Mom of 3 girls - Hallie (15), Christa (12), Chelsea (9), and 1 boy - Chris (18)
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#9
I concur. We don't have any sibling discipline role.
Mrs. V
Grandmother/Caregiver of 8 -6 at home, 2 boys: Nicolaas15 & Gabe 5; 4 girls: Lisbeth 15, Natalie 14, Lizzie 10 & Ashleigh 8 - 2 girls away from home 22 & 17 (2 adult sons and 1 adult daughter, all single parents)
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