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The Forgotten Part of Discipline
#11
(11-22-2020, 09:29 AM)Garth Wrote: There have been studies linking spanking with psychological problems such as anxiety and depression, addiction and criminal behaviour. Of course the vast majority of children who are spanked grow up to be normal law abiding adults. The proof is always in the pudding! Spanking if done in a loving and caring way I am convinced through my own experience is not only helpful to children but can improve the parent child relationship. If you however don’t believe this to be true I would suggest you not spank as your ambivalence will only confuse your child.

My bro says the research has bad sample or biAsed or something idk something science like idk that makes me feel like he knows what he’s talking about and spanking is ok he did mention that how it’s done is what matters and what’s left out so like ur post
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#12
(11-22-2020, 11:59 PM)Meggy Wrote:
(11-22-2020, 09:29 AM)Garth Wrote: There have been studies linking spanking with psychological problems such as anxiety and depression, addiction and criminal behaviour. Of course the vast majority of children who are spanked grow up to be normal law abiding adults. The proof is always in the pudding! Spanking if done in a loving and caring way I am convinced through my own experience is not only helpful to children but can improve the parent child relationship. If you however don’t believe this to be true I would suggest you not spank as your ambivalence will only confuse your child.

My bro says the research has bad sample or biAsed or something idk something science like idk that makes me feel like he knows what he’s talking about and spanking is ok he did mention that how it’s done is what matters and what’s left out so like ur post

My stepfather would absolutely agree with your brother's position. He is currently working for two places and neither will allow a counselor to support spanking even if he knows that would be the best option and he comes to that conclusion AFTER talking to all the people involved in the situation.

He says what's next? No more grounding because some fool decides it's imprisonment and children don't belong in prison?

I believe he's right in his belief that some actually respond better to physical discipline/correction....there are those individuals who will beat themselves up for the entire week they might be grounded.....then grounding becomes emotionally abusive for that person...IMNSHO....and spanking would be done and over with in a matter of minutes and that person can start feeling good about self again....I am NOT that person but some are.

All the so called well educated experts don't seem to consider the fact that we are individuals who can't be fit into a one size fits all sweater. That expert may have all kinds of expertise with his family but it's my mom and stepdad who have the expertise when it comes to our family.....not even my biodad has that kind of expertise because he isn't there all the time to discover all the hidden quirks and madness that exists differently in the mind of each individual.
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#13
Has anyone ever noticed also, that most of those so called 'experts' don't even have children? How can you be an expert on child rearing if you've never reared a child?
KAT
Mom of 4 boys - Tyler (22), Logan (19), Ryan (17), Connor (16) and 2 girls - Katie (21), Lexie (15)

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#14
That is sort of crazy thinking to think you can know all about kids if you never even had one but to then you don't got to have a brain tumor to cut one out of somebody right? Something I liked about going to group over seeing my doctor is that there is others there who understand cause they been through it to and so probably parents are the better experts on being parents. I sort of figure you parents here maybe talk in private as the expert panel on parenting here. Big Grin
Junior Girl - Age 14
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#15
(11-23-2020, 12:11 PM)Kittykat Wrote: Has anyone ever noticed also, that most of those so called 'experts' don't even have children? How can you be an expert on child rearing if you've never reared a child?

I don’t think that’s right
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#16
Since when does synthesizing research properly have to do with ur a parent or not??? Not adding this tog exactly 😕
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#17
I shouldn’t talk I’m only parroting I’ve gotten spanked for parroting before 🤷🏼‍♀️
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#18
(11-23-2020, 09:27 PM)Meggy Wrote: Since when does synthesizing research properly have to do with ur a parent or not??? Not adding this tog exactly 😕

I totally get what you're saying....you don't have to be a car to drive a car. Big Grin
I think when it comes to raising children the problem is with anyone who claims to be an expert period. My mom might be an expert in raising me but she isn't going to be an expert in raising you.......because we're different and will respond to things differently.
My mom has a lot of education in child development and while it can be used as a guideline for what to expect with a child of a certain age.....most children aren't going to fit into one neat category....so she ends up seeking advice and direction from others and doesn't simply rely on what she knows.
The big issue with some parenting theories is the tendency to seek evidence to support the theory instead of coming up with a theory by examining the evidence.
Kind of like what the flat earth folks do....or the creationists. Rolleyes
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#19
Nvm I just can’t lol Ug happy thanksgiving everyone 💕💕💕
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#20
Scarlette didn’t delete my comment bec of u I did bec of ppl I just don’t want to get into it but I think there’s hypocrisy and I’m gonna blow lololol
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